according to the great Dr. Seuss. I don’t know how well I’m doing with the balancing. I just finished handing in my “socratic seminar lesson” for my Thursday night class. Yea, it’s the wee hours of Monday. I had to finish putting in grades first for my 100 students. I failed about 40 students, maybe more. These are statistics I will be blamed for even though I know my teaching, my organization and everything else is better this year. The students…are basically the same as last year’s eleventh graders, just a mite more motivated.

Anyway, where was I? It’s 2:41am and I finished up grades and the project finally. Now I have to read 3 chapters for my Tuesday night class and write up my 1-page paper and figure out what my 10 page paper due who knows when will be about. I am thinking language and um diversity and um, what else is in the title for this class.

The rabbi wrote me a nice little note to help me out on the principal-is-on-my-case front. Meanwhile, the meeting to write this letter was particularly interesting. Everyone has noted that the rabbi has been soft on me. One of my friends even commented that the rabbi seems “close” to me. Well, it does help that he knows my entire life story and that I email him like once or twice a week, right? But seriously, he wrote the letter excusing me for Simchat Torah and Shemini Atzeret and the first two days of Sukkot but not Shavuot or Purim or any other holiday with work restriction or limited work restriction. He played devil’s advocate trying to get me to work the two days and miss the festivities. Now, what’s this all about? Well, he reminded me, that he IS supposed to turn me away so maybe, you know, by Shavuot “you won’t want to be Jewish,” he says. I laughed and said, “Ah, good job trying to turn me away” and I rolled my eyes. There was much more witty banter but I forgot most of it. Needless to say, he tried to playfully turn me away, I did a verbal sticking-out-my-tongue in response. Maturity…hmm.

Meanwhile, will I want to be Jewish by Shavuot? Could I become an atheist by then? Honestly, that’s the only way I could going back. Though, I must say, I am overwhelmed by all I am doing so I need to take a breather and stop kicking myself for not benching all the time and not learning the bathroom prayer and 5 times out of 10 forgetting to say the prayer BEFORE the food is in my mouth. I wish I could just swallow a blue pill and miracuously learn Hebrew. And what if no one wants to marry me? Or what if I forget everything I’m learning? What if I’m not learning anything? What if no Jewish boys want to marry me? :::ANXIETY::: I can’t even pronounce Purim properly.

Okay, it’s 3am. Maybe it’s time to sleep. My wrists certainly think it is time. Weighing in at 120 lbs and having had challah for lunch, I think it’s time to really figure out how to balance things. Hmm.