It sickens me when I hear jokes about gays in the Orthodox community. (On Shabbos, it was jokes about same sex marriages). It also sickens me when I hear stereotypes being trumpeted like facts. (On Purim, it was a joke about how gays men are all about being part-Martha Stewart, part-man. I’ve also had someone tell me they were glad their friend went through “brainwashing” workshops to make him straight. (Right, so he could then marry some poor woman and make her life miserable like my ex-boyfriend had made mine?)
No one ever thinks there might be someone gay in the room, just like they don’t worry someone might be offended by their racist joke. To me, they all fall under the same disgusting hate crime category. Perhaps this is why Heshy Fried is worried about his gay friend coming out in the Orthodox community.